Follow the mail on Twitter.

• +
• -
• Text size

Some people are saying that this World Cup has been rubbish. I think it has been great fun. Despite England’s disgraceful exit at the hands of Germany, the various examples of poor refereeing decisions and embarrassing slip-ups with the jabulani ball, there has been so much to entertain the fans. And most of it off the pitch.

I am struggling to decide what my favourite non-footballing (or at least off the ball) World Cup moment is; there have been so many. It all started long before the world cup started with the revelations about John Terry’s sexual exploits, and the England team soap opera just snowballed from there. Chris Waddle’s rant on BBC Five Live after the England v Germany game was right up there for entertainment value with Maradona’s assertions to the world press about not being gay and threatening to expose himself in Buenos Aires if Argentina won the cup; that would have been really entertaining!

There have been many great podcasts and phone-ins, from outraged England fans, Alan Davies’ Armchair World Cup to Baddiel and Skinner discussing losing their luggage, the Mexican wave and the vuvuzela. However, I think that my favourite moment so far was on James Corden’s World Cup Live show on ITV after the Netherlands v Uruguay semi-final. Britain’s favourite sports relief comedian and star writer of Gavin and Stacey, Corden, edited highlights of managers and other world cup team officials pole dancing after a goal, which was comic genius. But his ‘win a slow dance with Andy Murray’ competition was totally hilarious. It was brilliant to watch Corden at Wimbledon in a blue blazer and shorts carrying a board, trying to entice fans to win a dance with our other sporting almost hero. If only Corden had been at Wimbledon, instead of the Queen, the day I was there!

And competing with the footie every night has been Big Brother and the far superior Channel 4’s Sex Education Show. Again, pure genius. Take a Channel 4 road show about sex into schools to answer teenager’s questions and prove to them that we are all normal in different ways. This has involved men and women of different shapes and sizes getting naked on camera, close ups of willies and the clitoris and intimate conversations with old age pensioners about their sex lives. All wonderful stuff. It could have been even better if, instead of competing with the football, somehow the two could have been combined.

Back to the football: Naturally we want Spain to win. I am waiting to see what Paul the psychic octopus says about this one. Has been right about all the matches so far but then again this one does not involve Germany. My personal FIFA World Cup team is doing particularly well also and I will be competing on Sunday in my own mini league World Cup final, which is very exciting. Having proved my managerial skills with the team, I will naturally be putting myself forward for the England job when Fabio steps down. But for now Viva Espana…..