DTF to Hole

March releases coming!

March is just around the corner, and streaming services are wheeling out the big guns to build momentum for the incoming summer blockbuster season. From icy Nordic noirs to live-action anime adaptations to the cinematic conclusion of a legendary gangland saga, this week we’re taking a look at everything marching your way in March.

DTF St. Louis (March 1, HBO Max)

A limited series starring Jason Bateman and David Harbour, DTF St. Louis tells the story of two suburban dads caught in marriages that feel like stale sandwiches left too long in the fridge. Well, one of them, at least. Because Bateman’s character discovers a dating app called DTF (if you need the initials explained, congratulations on being a wholesome person), and he promptly drags Harbour down the rabbit hole with him.

But this isn’t just a suburban midlife-crisis comedy. Things take a dark turn when Harbour’s character ends up dead, and the police begin peeling back layers of digital secrets, marital lies and very questionable decisions. What starts as a story about boredom spirals into something far more sinister.

Young Sherlock (March 4, Prime Video)

Loosely based on Andy Lane’s books, Young Sherlock follows the Oxford years of the legendary detective, well before the pipe, the hat, and the sarcasm fully matured. Directed by Guy Ritchie, the series injects his trademark kinetic energy into a story that sees young Sherlock unravel an international conspiracy while also crossing paths with his future arch-nemesis Moriarty.

And yes, Colin Firth is in the cast, because it is British cinematic law that he must appear in anything involving waistcoats, foggy streets, or clever men brooding near windows.

If you love Ritchie’s hyperactive visual language or you’re a Holmes megafan, then this is for you. For everyone else, allow me to summarise the series in one word: unnecessary.

War Machine (March 6, Netflix)

“Alright dudes, hear me out. You bozos seen Predator? Not the recent one – the OG one. The Arnie one. So dope. So what if we remade it but – wait for it – with robots?!”

I have zero proof this pitch meeting happened, but I’m 99 per cent sure it did.

Alan Ritchson of Reacher fame, a mountain disguised as a man, stars as a US Army Ranger sent with his squad into the wilderness for a classified mission. Once there, they encounter a mysterious autonomous machine that decides humans are optional. Chaos ensues. Bullets fly. The soldiers must escape the killer Roomba on steroids and warn civilisation before things escalate.

Does it sound ridiculous? Absolutely. Will it be entertaining? Meh, doubtful. Will I watch it? Without a question.

Rooster (March 8, HBO Max)

Here’s all you really need to know about Rooster: it’s produced by Bill Lawrence, the man behind Scrubs, Ted Lasso, and Shrinking. And oh yeah, Steve Carell stars in it.

Carell plays a once-celebrated author who takes a teaching job at a university to help his struggling daughter, all while pretending his own emotional life isn’t a mess. Spoiler: it is a mess.

He’s joined by Phil Dunster (Lasso) and John C McGinley (Scrubs), forming a lineup so Lawrence-coded you can practically hear the heartfelt monologues backed by soft indie guitar.

One Piece Season 2 (Netflix)

The live-action One Piece, against all expectations (and all odds known to anime history), was actually good and a huge success. So, Netflix did the obvious thing: they backed the ship with a bigger budget and shoved it back into the Grand Line.

Season 2 promises new villains, bigger arcs, louder emotions, and at least one backstory engineered in a lab to make the entire fandom cry at the same timestamp worldwide. The Straw Hat crew continues sailing forward while the CGI budget expands like a Devil Fruit after three hours in the sun.

Peaky Blinders: The Immortal Man (March 20, Netflix)

By order of Netflix’s accounting department, the Shelbys return.

This feature-length conclusion to the iconic series finds Cillian Murphy’s Tommy Shelby older, wearier and living in self-imposed exile. But peace never lasts long in the Peaky universe. When his son Duke (played by Barry Keoghan) appears to be collaborating with the Germans during World War II, Tommy is dragged back into a conflict that threatens not just Birmingham but Britain itself.

The Immortal Man promises to tie up threads, unleash new traumas, and maybe, just maybe, set the stage for future spin-offs. Dust off your flat caps, boys. We ride again.

Detective Hole (March 26, Netflix)

Fun fact: Joel Kinnaman is half Swedish and fluent, which makes him the perfect co-star for Norway’s rugged Tobias Santelmann in Jo Nesbø’s Detective Hole, Netflix’s ambitious attempt to finally give Harry Hole the adaptation he deserves.

Based on the novel The Devil’s Star, the series is premium Nordic noir: icy weather, moral ambiguity, crimes that get under your skin, and characters who need therapy more urgently than coffee.

With Jo Nesbø writing the script himself, fans are treating this as a holy event. If viewership hits the stratosphere, expect more seasons and more soul-crushing drama.